Tomorrow we are driving to visit my dad's side of the family. That is always a riot and a half. I always realize anew when I visit these people that family has got to be a lot thicker than blood. These people are blood relatives, but they aren't my family at all. They don't even like my family. They are nasty and competitive. They try start fights with each other. No one wants to give gifts to anyone else. One aunt hates us so much that she hardly speaks to us and many times doesn't come at all. We all sit around and stare at each other in awkward silence and watch the many kids that we have never met play together (providing they come this year?). My grandmother adds her obligatory insults to the fray, and in short, it's always fun-filled family Christmas. I can't wait.
At least my aunt's cats are cute, though. She has four now. I had the flu last time I went there for Christmas four years ago. My sister said that puking in the basement was much more exciting than an awkward game of Scategories with the family.
Merry Fucking Christmas.